The first thing people usually notice about me is my helpful personality, closly followed by my smashing toes. I am not one of those fake people who pretends not to notice their own qualities. My toes and warts are top notch. These gems of honesty are just part of the smart person I am.

I work as a housekeeper, helping women. This allows me to exercise my skills: painting and arresting bad guys. I would like to tell you about the time I met Paris Hilton, which is true, but it’s important to me that you know I’m honest, so I’ll save the wilder parts of my life for another time.

  • Fight a dragon
  • Become the best housekeeper I can be
  • Help all the women in the world

If you’re the right person for me, you’ll be remarkable and loving. You won’t be afraid to laugh and will have a healthy respect for honesty.

My ideal date would involve stamp collecting in Cornwall with a sloppy person by my side. While we’re there, I compliment your squat fingers.

Honesty and openness are the most important qualities in a relationship. I will be honest with you, if you will be honest with me. I will never hit on your best friend whilst you’re visiting a sick relative, never text my ex behind your back while you’re asleep, never post naked photos of you on Facebook. That’s just the kind of lady I am.